An (Almost Contradictory) Sequel to a Previous Post

Apparently I have so many deep, meaningful thoughts swirling around up here that just one "reflection on married life" blog post just isn’t going to cut it.

I previously went off about how marriage hasn’t been different at all and how much life hasn’t changed. This stuff is all true. But with Brock being gone so much playing baseball, my situation often temporarily reverts back to “Single Carolyn”. Being "Married Carolyn" in "Single Carolyn's" life has made me aware of the presence of at least one small change...

I have always considered myself to be quite impulsive. A quick Target run for chapstick and gum once ended in a full fledged shopping spree; I left the store only after forking out half a paycheck for a new bedspread/sheet set, a church dress, shoes, shampoo, an air freshener, a lamp and some Flinstone gummy vitamins. (Which I’m pretty sure I polished off by the time I got home. I love gummy vitamins- they’re totally justifiable candy.) Oh, I also got the lip gloss and gum, in case you were wondering. There have been far too many instances like this in my life. And this impulsive behavior doesn’t only occur while shopping. One time I cut my own bangs merely ten minutes after watching a Neutrogena commercial that featured a cute, indy looking girl with blunt cut bangs. The result? I looked like someone got drunk and cut my hair with a samurai sword. Heaven forbid I wait a day and let a pro tackle the job for 10 bucks.

Well, I recently went shopping one solo afternoon to kill some time. I figured I deserved a little indulgence, being the strong, enduring baseball widow that I was. My drug of choice? Forever 21, of course. There is nothing more satisfying than finding the perfect gem of a shirt for $10, even if you have to spend hours rifling through piles of unorganized, bejeweled/tasseled garments first. Oddly enough, once I got to Forever 21, I couldn’t seem to get myself to actually buy anything. There were plenty of fine garments worthy of my purchase. Believe me, I wanted to go all out and spoil myself with this poor quality, but affordable/trendy crap.This was therapy, dang it! This was my loneliness coping mechanism! I puttered around the store for hours, my arms full of potential purchases, deliberating. I made a few unsuccessful attempts to try on a confusing drapey/pirate-ish looking shirt, but it was impossible to distinguish the arm holes from the neck hole on this thing. I somehow managed to put it on sideways about three different times, before aborting that mission. I finally gave up and dropped everything on a random shelf, making those Forever 21 employees work for their 7.25 an hour. I just couldn’t pull the trigger on those $1.50 necklaces! And as comfy as they looked, I just couldn't trick myself into believing that those $10.50 workout pants wouldn't completely change shape after one washing. This new found maturity and sensibility was really throwing me off. Since when have I not completely enjoyed spending money? The answer to that? Since I met Brock. Brock is the ultimate typical accounting major. Every transaction we make  is accounted for in a detailed spreadsheet. The fact that I am reminded of our bank account balance every time I log onto the computer eliminates that "out of sight, out of mind" spending mentality that I've always known so well. I love this about Brock and more importantly, I need this. Who knows what will happen with my bangs in the future, but I can confidently say that my impulse shopping habits have been (mostly) kicked. For the record, I did end up leaving with a pair of earrings, a tank top and some serious buyer’s remorse. Who would have thought I would feel guilty over a $13 purchase? Well, I’m proud to say I did.

When You Feel Really Cool, Only to Find Out Later That You Didn't...

I came across these lovely pictures from the time Brock and I went shooting over Thanksgiving break last fall.

This is what I thought I looked like:



This is what I actually looked like:


And here is a close-up:

And this was before we got married. I'm astonished Brock actually went through with it after seeing this little gem. I guess the thought of waking up next to a Biggest Loser contestant wasn't enough to completely scare him off. We now know that no matter what, Brock Sargent is officially not shallow.

Widow Weekend

I was officially a (temporary) widow this weekend.

Instead of losing my husband to death, however, I lost him to UVU baseball. This will happen about four more times until Orem's horrid weather shapes up and the team starts having games at home. I won't lie- I hate having him gone so much. But I'm trying to look for the positives. Brock's spot on the team is evidence of his athletic genes, which will surely aid in my quest to create a posse of genetically superior children. It's also exciting to watch him pitch out there (even if it's just via UVU's animated game tracker), knowing that my husband is numbered among a very small percentage of grown men who can actually throw a baseball over 90 mph. And of course, there's no way I would have been able to enjoy tonight's slightly pornographic, yet tasteful documentary on natural childbirth with Brock present. He'd have been throwing up five minutes into it, when it showed Ricki Lake birth a live baby in a swimming pool.

In order to keep myself busy, I decided to undertake a little craft project yesterday. And, if I do say so myself, I'm quite pleased with the results.

Presenting... my placemat pillows.
Yes, this craft project was probably at about a 3rd grade skill level. It literally requires purchasing a placemat, splitting one side open, stuffing it and sewing up the side. I think the windsock I made in 7th grade was probably more challenging. But hey, I can't help it- I am proud of how they turned out. I tend to be one of those people who gets all gung ho about a project, dives in without putting much thought into it, and then loses interest about ten minutes in. This makes for a lot of half done, sloppy finished products. I guess I am just happy that for some reason or another, my normally 7 year old attention span held out a little longer this time.

This is a close up. See? I even sewed in straight lines! My mom is so proud.

Once my house is all decorated and cute, I'm going to force a virtual picture tour on everyone.

I won't lie and say I am excited for next widow weekend, but at least it will be a good chance to get in some more quality craft time. Gosh, I really am such a typical wife. Blogging, crafting... soon I'll probably be posting pictures of my outfits before I leave the house each day. NOT.